Reading and writing memoir

Written by jamie on November 23rd, 2010

Thanks to my good friend, I am now hooked on memoirs. It’s intriguing to read someone’s personal story, told in a way that’s not textbook dry, but instead told like a good bedtime story. I just finished a book by John Grogan; his memoir. His first book, Marley and Me, was one of the best books I think I’ve ever read. (Apparently he’s helped spark a new genre of writing: dogoir.) When I ran across The Longest Trip Home at Goodwill, I snatched it up, figuring the writing would be just as intriguing and heartfelt as his first book. It was, and I’m beginning to wonder if he can write a book that doesn’t leave me sniffling and sobbing at the end. My poor husband was kept up last night as I sniffed my way through one more chapter for some much needed closure.

The more memoirs I read, the more I am impressed at how so many authors can write their childhood memories in such vivid detail. They draw you in as they recall minute, seemingly forgettable details such as the scratchy fabric of a winter sweater, the taste of Mom’s meatloaf, and sounds of birds chirping from a scene twenty years prior. It simply amazes me. I have vague, random memories from childhood, but just can’t seem to pluck those precise pieces from my subconscious that give the story real substance. Nor can I recall them in an organized, cohesive timeline.

I’m sure many people that attempt to record those memories stumble upon the same problem. It must take days and months of hard concentration, meditation, remembering and writing to finally get each individual story just right. I think I sometimes have the inaccurate picture of prolific writers sitting down and pumping out 100 pages per hour without any effort. This is probably not true, and I bet most authors would be happy to sit down and tell me about the painstaking process that their books take.

After working with seniors and hearing snippets of some of the amazing stories that some of them have and some struggle to recall, I am realizing the importance of recording my stories for future generations. I love hearing other people’s stories. Occasionally Drew will get a sentimental glint in his eyes (or a typical sly Drew grin; those that know him know exactly what I’m talking about) and he’ll recall a story from childhood, often revolving around his deceased father and some great lesson learned. I love hearing those stories because it gives me a glimpse into who he was and how it’s shaped him into the man I love.

I had a friend comment once that she loved reading the stories on the blog and wished that I would tell them verbally. I don’t work like that. I’m not quick on my feet and I think better when I have some quiet time to reflect. It’s why I write. I communicate best that way.

I’ve been inspired to attempt to record some of my memories; childhood as well as recent. Some of them may end up here, some may not. Here’s hoping the details will rise to the surface.

 

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Reclaim

Written by jamie on November 19th, 2010

Drew and I were invited to a church event last night. We received the invite on Facebook, and at first, I honestly didn’t even read through the invite, as I grow so tired of the many invites I receive from well intentioned friends. I saw it was on a Thursday night and immediately marked that I was not attending, since Thursday is my rehearsal night. Drew was intrigued by it and decided he wanted to go. I ended up finding someone to lead worship in my place this week, as I have a wedding shower for a dear friend this evening that I wanted to attend. With no rehearsal to lead, I decided I could go too.

We weren’t sure what to expect. I only knew it was some sort of gathering for young adults. It seemed like a worthwhile event, so I went in with as open a mind as I could muster. We saw friends there, and a couple that we invited showed up and sat at our table. We saw a young man that we had just met Sunday at another local Methodist church. I had led worship for a sweet friend who desperately needed a family vacation, and I had a chance to talk briefly with some of the people involved in her church. He walked up to Drew and I with a, “Hey guys! How are you doing?” like he’d known us our whole lives. I smiled as I searched my brain for how I knew this guy. It finally registered and we chatted for a few minutes.

I people watched before the program began. I often feel frumpy and uncool around other people my age. I see the trendy outfits and the cute scarves that the girls are wearing, and I glance down at my outfit, which is what was clean that day, as I haven’t gotten around to laundry that week and the few “cool” clothes I have are all dirty. I noticed the guys walking around, also trendy and oh so cool, and I once again thought about how I do not get the tight jean trend on guys. I looked around at the cool graphic on screen, the random abstract art scattered around the room and the lights artistically placed on stage. I realized that some days I feel I’m caught between a church that is so completely disengaged from society and anything relevant, and the church that is just trying too hard to be cool. Where’s the fine line?

We chose the table with one of our pastors. As the meeting began, we were given a handful of discussion questions. As the questions moved past surface value and got a bit deeper, Drew turned to me and said loud enough for our pastor to hear, “We should have picked a different table.” Our couple friends sitting next to us laughed in agreement and then said, “We go to Saint Paul’s…” (a different Methodist church in town). Then she added on, “You’re at the smart ass table.” Our pastor merely laughed and replied, “Good!”

We dove head first into questions such as, “What is your dream for the church?” “Has the church failed you?” “Do you think there is hope for the church?” My sometimes censor-less hubby immediately blurted out “Less bozos on committees” for the first question. I had to concur on that one. In my mind, I thought of dear friends who have been deeply hurt by the church because of not well thought out decisions from committees. When we reached the “Has the church failed you?” question, I tried to think of ways to diplomatically answer this one. I wanted to shout a very emphatic “YES!!!” as I thought back on some of the “ick” I’ve been working through as far as church goes. Drew answered that he didn’t think “fail” was quite the right word, and I offered “disappointed.” As far as my issues go, I have to remind myself that it goes both ways. Although I haven’t been totally pleased with the church in the past couple years, I know a lot of it is simply from the wall I have put up. Some of it is my fault. But that’s all for another post…

We continued to discuss and jotted down some key points that we brought up. It was encouraging to be open and honest with our pastor there and find that he agreed with most of the points we had. As discussion time wrapped up, we had a short talk by someone who encouraged us to fill the gap in our churches where there was no young adult ministries. It was pretty encouraging.

Drew brought up a point that he felt there was nothing in the church for young married couples with no children. We sort of fall off the radar. I often felt that as a single person too. For young singles, there’s nothing there. Any group that was formed simply felt like a meat market, a place to meet a potential date. After I got married, I breathed a sigh of relief, glad that I would no longer have to struggle with that and could now join those married Bible studies I had always heard about. But it wasn’t much better. It seems any type of married ministry is family oriented and geared toward the kids. That’s great, but for a newly married couple with no plans in the near future for children, it sort of leaves us stranded.

We didn’t leave with any answers, but it was encouraging to at least talk through some different issues with like minded people. And for someone who spends their days surrounded by people 75 and older, it was refreshing to be with young adults once more.

 

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My new dream furniture

Written by jamie on November 15th, 2010

Okay, so in the last post I talked about the furniture I fell in love with.

We kept shopping and found this.

It has curved lines and the ottoman fits right on, like a puzzle piece. As if that wasn’t cool enough, there’s a separate “chair” that also fits on.

Be still my beating heart.

(If my 6’5″ husband can lay out on it like this, you know the thing is HUGE.)

 

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Our weekend part 2

Written by jamie on November 9th, 2010

On Saturday, after leisurely sleeping in and having breakfast together, we bummed around the house being lazy. I half watched some random movie on TV while puttering around and Drew was in his office, working on various things. In the afternoon, I met a friend at Tom Brown Park for some photography fun. We’re both aspiring wannabe photographers and enjoy puttering around and learning various things on our cameras. We brought tripods and took a few practice shots with cameras set up on them.

She was using her tripod for the first time, I think, and was gleefully excited when she discovered what different knobs did. I was able to show her a few things with the tripod, and she helped me find where the black and white setting was on my camera… something I knew was there but had just never played with.

We had fun walking around and just playing with random things on our camera. I managed to get a couple decent shots.

After returning home, Drew and I ran an errand or two, and then spent the rest of the evening lounging at home. We laughed that he spent most of the evening in the office and I was on the couch, couponing.When he heard me printing coupon after coupon, he shouted, “Is this what we’ve come to on a Saturday night?” Apparently so.

The next day we went to church and volunteered in the sound booth. He did all the hard work, I just clicked on the next slide for the powerpoint. After church, we returned home for a lunch of grilled cheese and tomato bisque soup. We read the paper, I took a nap, and we were lazy.

Later in the afternoon, we decided to take a drive toward Thomasville to visit a furniture store and the open house they were having. We’ve been dreaming of when we can actually have a nicely furnished living room with seating for more than two. We figured the prices would be unobtainable and since we’re trying to do the Dave Ramsey thing, figured we’d have to save up until next year for a furniture purchase. We were pleasantly surprised that much of it was quite obtainable in the near future. We found a sofa piece that we were both drawn to. Well, I think I more fell in love with it. I was mentally rearranging our living room to make room for it. We sat in it for a few minutes to make sure our butts didn’t go numb, and envisioned it in our home. We talked about it on the way home, and decided we may be able to purchase it in the next month or so. That would be good, since my mother in law is coming to visit soon and she’ll have some other place to sit than the floor.

With the rest of my Sunday evening, I attempted to bake the cake that I needed for my cake decorating class tonight, and after a trip to WalMart (where I found my sister, also purchasing cake supplies) I returned home to discover I had forgotten butter and could not bake said cake. I ended up baking it last night while I also prepared the frosting I need for the class. I think I may be sick of cake and frosting by the time this is all said and done.

Here’s hoping I don’t turn into a cake class dropout. Pictures to come…

 

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